Sorry to bore you with my inspirational talks. After many months of dating and of course doing other stuffs, we were too deep to be separated. The thought of him keeps me glowing and smiling all day. I couldn't get over this guy, he was always in my thought, my every move, in my sleep. It was like a ''Dream come true''. He always tells me this; '' you are beautiful and i love you no matter what''. Whenever he says this, i will get a butterfly in my Tommy.
There is something about this guy i didn't tell you, my friends usually tell me that he looks like one of Nigerian's T.V presenter; ‘Adams' by name. I mean they look alike way too much to differentiate. I myself noticed that. In fact i saw a picture they took together, i was wondering if they came from the same parents or were separated from birth. Everything was all cozy and fun, no dull moment, we go out, come back , eat, play together, no sad moment . Until one day, a day I can do anything possible to wake up if it was a dream.
'' I am sorry! I can't get over my ex. I have tried but it wasn't working out. This whole time we were together, i was using you to know if i can forget about her.'' I saw this message when i woke up early in the morning exactly 7:00 am. I stood up properly, i entered the bathroom to wash my face, and maybe I wasn't seeing clearly. I came back, took the phone again, I read the message over and over again. '' Hmm! this message can't be for me, may be for someone else'', i thought to myself, trying to hide the truth from myself. I overcame my fears of breakup, and i decided to call him.
I dialed his number, and my heart was panting. I could feel the heaviness in my heart, even though i haven't heard the real explanation of the message he sent. I was so desperate to hear from him. If i don't hear from him that day, i don't know how my day would be. I tried calling and calling, he didn't pick. I was hearing myself talking to myself, that's what mad people does'' talking to themselves''. I couldn't sit down anymore, i was gallivanting all over the room, moving to and fro. '' God! What’s happening to me, am i running mad?''. I was just mumbling these words to myself.
'' No! This cannot happen, not now. This message cannot be for me.''
I tried to calm down and give it a try again by calling him, this time around, his line was switched off. This is the height of my insanity, i started weeping uncontrollable even though i might not really know what has happened. I was very devastated, it was as if my whole life has crumbled.
The next day, he called me, I was in the kitchen, and I ran to my room as fast as my legs could carry me. What i haven't done in my life, i ran like an athlete on that day. I grabbed my phone immediately and spoke immediately. I was expecting to hear something different not the message.
'' So are we over!'' This were the words that came out of my mouth, i was blank and out of words. He responded by given me the usual '' yes'' answer. God I was shattered and heartbroken, I slowly dropped the phone and climbed my bed and cried myself to sleep. Nothing was done on that day, I left the house untidy, and my parents traveled, my siblings all went away for holiday. I was alone in the house.
Thank God I didn't do something crazy. I sat down, thought about my life, why I have been going through series of heart break, i realized something: i was always too fast and desperate. Which makes them not to know my worth. I had to work on myself to become the woman every guy wouldn't want to have but only those who are ready and serious. Believe me, I am way better and fulfilled now. It was as if my whole life depends on a guy to be happy. If i can go through this and come out as a fulfilled and strong lady, who says you can't.
You were not expecting my love story to end like this right? It actually ended for good, not everything that pleases us is good before God’s sight. Sometimes what we adore today might turn out to be our bitterness. I adored this guy and he turned out to be my worst nightmare. People comes into our life for different reasons which we all know, some came to stay while others came to make us strong.
I became stronger after going through these two love affairs that ended in a disaster. But today I will tell you that I am glad that I passed through this experience which has made me a better individual with a clearer vision. Always know what you want in a relationship, and never make your life woven around him alone, have friends and have fun, love him and at the same time, know you worth and stand. And if you are going through a heart break right now, don’t be bitters about it and love yourself first, ‘’ it’s you that will make you feel better’’
Note from the author: Never let anything or anyone steal your happiness, your happiness lies in your hand. I hope we got something from this story. Thanks for reading and remember you are your own hero.
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